Love Life of an Elderly
September 13th, 2010
I am single, healthy and, at 62 years of age, still sexy. Love (read the story of Bob and Dorothy) is still in my heart and in my soul. Admittedly though, “love” has now a different perspective than when I was younger, with much libido. When friends ask me if I am going to marry again or not, my typical response is a curt, “why should I?”
Yes, “why should I?” Gone are the days when “love” invariably leads to marriage, have kids, build a home, settle down, etc. I’ve been through all that. Now, “love” is either a “fling” or a relationship, with marriage more unreachable than the moon.
My wife was no trophy:
In one episode of “Everybody Loves Raymond,” one of my favorite sitcoms, Raymond’s parents had a heated argument. Finally, his mother said, “I can make up my mind and make my own decisions. I am not going to be a trophy wife.” Raymond’s father was stumped and, after what seemed an eternity, said, “I could never recall joining a contest wherein I won you as a trophy.”
Well, no wife is and practically all husbands make fun with their wives until they are gone forever and realize what a big vacuum their loss has created in their lives. The vacuum left by my wife of 36 years cannot just be filled by someone I meet in the Internet, have coffee with and, if the chemistry is right, take to bed – all in one episode.
A difficult choice:
When the kids are out and I am alone at home and the need to have someone to talk to is unmet, life can be very, very tough. I can either pray or go out. Prayers, however, are good temporary fixes. Going out brings give more possibilities. I can just sit in a coffee shop, to talk with friends or watch the lovely legs go by. Or I can fix a date with a “fling” or with someone for a relationship. Both have their pros and cons.
1. Flings:
Are easy, fast and cheap, very much like having fast food. Typical of fast food, they are unhealthy. Passions without emotions differ not much as a rooster’s need to shag a hen. They just shake off the dust from their feathers right after. And I do scrub myself hard to remove the feelings of guilt for having done such a thing. But to keep away from it for good is another thing.
2. Relationships:
This nourishes the imagination more than the inclination. Very much like fine dining, and costs just as much. Takes too long to prepare and, oftentimes, the menu says more than what we ultimately get. And the worse part is still to come – loss of freedom
One was 47 years old when I met her though one of the social networking sites. She was a chairperson of the science department in one of the large colleges in her hometown. Has a master’s degree and is working on her PhD. I ultimately found the time to visit her. We had dinner, followed by lunch the following day and the rest is up to one’s imagination. On my way back home, I started getting text messages about my smoking. Yuk!
Then lately, there is there 42 year old woman. She works with an export/import company. We met, had coffee, necked in the car, agreeing to meet a few days after that for more serious business. Suddenly she started asking me who I am with each time I go for a movie or to have coffee. Jesus Christ, I have never had a third degree with my wife. I am not inclined to have one now.
The fix?
I and my wife had six years of knowing each other before we finally married. Yet, our knowing each other never really stopped even until her death. Nevertheless, my love stayed and died with her. In this age of stem cell research, I would settle for a fling/relationship clone. I am not inclined to have someone else in my bed at night, nor would I give up my freedom to anyone lesser. Besides, there is always a certain degree of suspense in the unknown.
